Monday, March 26, 2012

last straw

I am freaking done.If i don't move soon I am going to lose it totally.Day after day he sits and antagonizes me left and right. I want to take his cell phone and shove it up his ass so far it comes out of his throat. This was one of the biggest mistakes I have ever made in my life.As soon asI move I am making sure we never have to move in with somebody again. Especially my freaking brother in law. Yesterday the hubby went off on him.Its nice to see i am not the only one losing my freaking mind living here. I can't take it....I am so freaking done!!!

Sunday, March 25, 2012

My Baby Boy

As I sit here I wonder where I would be without my baby boy. WHen getting up in early in the morning while everyone is still sound sleep I sit in the living room by myself until I here the creak of the bedroom door opening. Baby boy has decided that its mommy time and comes out looks at me with his chestnut colored eyes as to say good morning mommy how are you feeeling today? He goes to the couch climbs in his spot lays there with his huge eyes planted on me. So for about an hour I have baby boy all to myself and I never feel as calm as I do in the we early morning with baby boy. Baby boy is very spoiled and I have to say I have my hand is some of that.But he is more spoiled by his daddy then he is by me.
There are some days that he doesn't even bother with me but to open the bedroom door as to say look at me and are you alright mommy? I try to get as much time with him as possible because once daddy is around its DADDYTIME!!!
We raised him to be a good boy and there are days he just won't mind. But then you feel bad for scolding him because he is not minding.What I love the most is when he crawls up on the bed with me and comes and lays his head on my leg as to say here I am. Its very soothing at times and very calming when baby boy does this. He likes to play chase and howls on cue. if you haven't figured out who baby boy is by now he is my dog bullet. I love him so and would love to have a big house with a big yard for him but finacially thats not possible at this time. So he goes alittle stir crazy and chases his tail and gets in the puppy bow. There are times he makes me laugh and then there are times he drives me absolutely bonkers but I wouldn't have it any other way.I can't go to sleep at night unless daddy is playing with making him bark. His bark at times can be annoying but most of the time especially at bedtime its very calming. lol
Again as I said in the beginning I don't know what I would do with out my baby boy.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

1st day of Spring

Let me just tell you I am absolutely positively escatic that its spring. I even went outside and trimmed my lavendar bush in the warm sunshine. Then I sat with my neighbor for awhile and we talked about what she has been doing and what i have been doing.Its so nice to be out of hibernation.I can't wait to start walking and possibly finding a job.
To top off this glorious day I sold one of my bracelets today. YAY!!!!
As for my eating I am doing pretty well but I am not going to weigh myself till sunday.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Stupid Spermdonor

Today is a beautiful day and we took the dog out to the doggy park so he could run and play with other dogs. It was great till i get a friend request on my phone from my spermdonor biological father. now mind this over a year ago i try to stay in contact and they stopped all of the sudden. making me feel like dirt and worthless shit. I am not going through that again. I don't care if he is sick i just don't care none of that side of my family has ever given a rats ass about me so why should i.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A Student Again

For the past week or so I have been cotemplating whether to go back to school for my bachelors. Yesterday I talked to someone about it and have decided that for todays economy and my potential job aspects it would be beneficial to attain this degree. This will give me opportunities for jobs that are not so mediocre. I mean I will work in the retail business but I want to be the manager not the underfoot that gets stepped on all the time. I think i would make an excellent boss for employees and in all fairness not treat them as employers seem to be treating their employees here lately. So in a couple of weeks I will be a student again..... I feel I need to do this and i know i can do it because i am strong willed and put my best foot forward on all things that i set out to do.
In the meantime I will look for a job that will give me part time hours so that I can save to move and get vehicle. I will continue to monitor my caloric intake and do my very best to lose this weight that may be hindering me from getting a decent job.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Well back in the saddle again.....

As some of you know i took a break from my weight loss journey and during the break i regained 20 lbs of what i loss back. This morning i decided to face the scale again after weighing myself last week at the doctors office where i came to the results of the gaining back 20 lbs. This day though i said hello to the scale got on and read that i have a 3 lbs weight loss this week. I am so happy and so ready to rejoin this journey of weight loss again.
I will continue to lose weight and focus on finding a job.I think my weight played a major factor in my not getting hired at the two places i had interviews with. Very sad that happened but it made realize it was time to come back from my break.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Interviews and more interviews

Well here it is the beginning of March and i still have not found a job.I keep interviewing but they keep telling me they are still interviewing and they will call me as soon as they are done.I have an interview with walmart today for the 3rd time for a different position in one of the same stores as I interviewed for cashier. If I don't get hired soon I am going to go live in an art colony.
As for my weight loss I really don't know if I have lost weight because I haven't weighed myself yet this month. Today I feel bloated and sick.I think I am coming down with a cold which is not surprising with this stupid ass weather. One minute its snowing next we are having sixty degree weather.
I hope everyone is doing well and I will let you all know how my interviewing turns out soon.